The Joke That Led To Suicide…

By now practically everyone in the world has heard about the prank phone call made by two Australian disc jockeys on a nurse at King Edward VII Hospital. They pretended to be the Queen and Prince Charles inquiring about Kate Middleton’s condition. The nurse answering the phone mistakenly put the call through and another nurse gave out some rather benign information. The nurse who put the call through, Jacintha Saldanha, ended up committing suicide a day later. A tragic ending to what was supposed to be a few harmless laughs.

I don’t know how to feel and think about this prank. When I first heard it I felt is was all in good fun. Who could it hurt? These types of prank calls are played by radio stations all the time. I have heard some where they practically aggravate the person into literally having a stroke or heart attack. I even find most of those funny. This joke was much shorter and certainly not meant to upset anyone. It was just for laughs and frankly I didn’t even find it funny. After I had heard it I didn’t think any more about it. However, the media would not let it go. The story went viral in every type of public media. The humiliation of a simple mistake was not confined to the hospital or a few thousand listeners of the radio show. It was worldwide. Apparently, the pressure of such a humiliation was devastating and too much for the Jacintha to bear. So, at 46 years of age and with two teenagers, she chose to end her life.

The disc jockeys are distraught over this outcome, which no one could have predicted. They didn’t even expect their call to get past security screening. Their accents were terrible. But a hospital is a very busy and stressful place and somehow the call got through. No damage was done. No secrets revealed. Just one nurse was pushed over the edge and driven to take her own life.

If I had been in charge of the radio station and the prank was proposed, I would have more than likely approved it. Even now, as I sit here thinking about it, I am not sure the prank was the only reason why Jacintha ended her life. It can’t be. There has to be more to her story. There has to have been some mental condition like depression or some serious personal issues weighing on her. I can’t imagine how else this would make sense. I suppose the humiliation caused by the prank might have contributed to her stress and pushed her over the edge, but surely the prank itself was not the underlying cause? 

Nevertheless, an investigation is being done, the disc jockeys were given a leave of absence, the London Hospital is instructing staff how to screen calls more diligently and going over protocol, maybe telephone pranks will be outlawed in many places…but is this really the answer? I don’t think so. 

We have so many people suffering a mental illness of some kind who aren’t getting help. All these mass shootings at schools, movie theaters etc are done by people who slipped through the cracks. They showed signs of being disturbed, of being loners, or whatever you want to label them. The facts about them only come out after some tragic event. Why weren’t they helped before they took other lives or their own? I imagine that soon facts will come out in this case too, that show this nurse was suffering from some condition or situation that made her especially vulnerable and fragile at this particular time. I don’t think the DJs are to blame, or the radio station is to blame, or even the media is to blame.

I think that everyone wants to be able to blame someone for this tragedy, but no reasonable person can conclude that if not for that prank, Jacintha would be okay because she was obviously suffering from something. Maybe co-workers noticed something about her behavior, maybe her family did, maybe someone knows the root cause of her problems and hasn’t revealed it yet. I don’t know, but I find it hard to belief that a simple prank drove her to this abysmal end. Isn’t that what they should be investigating?  What was going on with her or in her personal life that made her take this drastic step? And, how did everyone around her miss the signs? And what can we do to be more aware, spot signs of trouble in those around us and what actions can we take to help them before something happens? That’s what would be more productive and a better use of everyone’s time. That’s what might turn this tragic outcome into something a little more positive. That’s what I think.

A Politically Correct Christmas?

One day I was out walking towards our neighborhood avenue with my daughter. I wondered aloud if they had put up the annual Christmas lights along the street. When we got to the corner I could see they had. Delightful snowflakes across each corner adorned the avenue. Then my daughter burst my bubble before it was even fully inflated, “I see that have politically correct lights now,” she said matter of factly. “What?,” I answered, “what do you mean?” And she explained how there are no candy canes, trees, ornament decorations, just generic snowflakes which didn’t symbolize Christmas at all. Snowflakes are politically correct!

This has been on the back burner of my mind ever since it happened a few days ago. It won’t go away which is why I am writing about it now. Since when has Christmas become a political issue? What’s wrong with saying “Merry Christmas” all of a sudden? Why can’t we have ornaments, candy canes, presents and trees all over the place? Why does Christmas, a religious holiday, have to be politically correct when nothing was wrong with it in the first place?

When my kids were little, hell when I was little, we celebrated Christmas during school hours. We made decorations and presents, has a little classroom party and exchanged Christmas cards. I hear this is no longer acceptable. Not everyone celebrates Christmas so let’s put an end to it in the schools! That’s the solution? Take the one holiday a year that teaches children about giving and love and squash it! We just can’t have all that cheer…it’s become offensive. Who the hell it is bothering? Who is complaining about a holiday that promotes good will towards men? A holiday that wishes everyone peace and joy? You got a problem with that? 

So Christmas trees are now being referred to as Holiday trees? Will red and green be banned from the classrooms? Is the title “WHITE” Christmas hard to swallow? Must we say Happy Holidays instead of Merry Christmas? Nativity scenes are disappearing. Why is the story of the birth of a baby, that is centuries old, now have no place in our times and culture? How about Christmas carols? Will they also be a thing of the past? Now that I think of it, I was just at the mall yesterday and expected to hear nothing but Christmas music…I didn’t hear anything I recognized. I couldn’t even tell you what they were playing. One year I am singing and dancing to music and embarrassing my kids and yesterday…nothing.

Why are we allowing our Christmas traditions and values to be washed away after centuries of tradition? We have gone beyond the sin of losing the real meaning to the commercialization of Christmas. Now we are going to destroy it altogether by taking away every symbol, every mention of the word Christmas, every nativity scene, every light, card and stocking, every present, candy cane and ornament, every scrap of wrapping paper, every carol and gingerbread man, every Christmas list, every bit of mistletoe, every Christmas story and movie and cartoon…and of course the main offenders, the pagans, Santa Claus, Rudolph and Frosty…they all have to go. 

I don’t get it. I really don’t. I always encouraged my children to embrace all cultures. We aren’t Jewish, but we had dreidels to spin for Hanukkah and watched Sherri Lewis and Lamb Chop explain the Festival of Lights. We understood the tradition of the menorah and why it was lit over eight days. We aren’t black, but we got books out about Kwanza and the meaning behind that holiday. We aren’t Hispanic, but we  tried to appreciate the significance of January 6th, Three Kings Day. If there were more holidays we were aware o trust me, my girls wanted to not only learn about them, but celebrate them. Now, it looks like pretty soon we won’t even be able to celebrate our own holiday.

I came across this message from Ben Stein regarding this same topic. It is well written and worth reading: 

Ben Stein's message

Season’s Greetings! I wouldn’t want to offend anyone @@ (eye roll).

Dr. Phil on Lindsay Lohan’s Arrest

I am not a big fan of Dr. Phil or Lindsay Lohan, but I am peeved and decided to say something.

I happened to be watching The Talk, when they had their guest Dr. Phil come out to promote his new book “Life Codes.” The first thing they asked him was his opinion on Lindsay Lohan’s recent arrest. First he gives a quick resume of his legal background with the court system and then offers up his two cents. He explains that Lindsay is on probation, or as he likes to call it “sweet poison,” because if she does anything wrong she just bounces back to jail without a trial. He goes on to say that when on probation you have to avoid even the appearance of impropriety or you can get in trouble. That doesn’t seem to apply to Lindsay, as far as I have seen. However, Dr. Phil says, you don’t take a high risk individual (Lindsay) and put them in a high risk situation (Bar at 4 am) and then act surprised when something bad happens. Now here is the part that irritates me: He says it may have been her parents who got her into this situation, but she is an adult now (at 26) and she makes her own decisions and must take responsibility. He adds, “when you choose the behavior, you choose the consequences [she’ll go to jail] and then we will spend about $25,000 a year of taxpayer money for her to look at a wall, I guess.” Very compassionate, wouldn’t you say? Well that’s if nothing worse happens, Dr. Phil.

I’ll explain why all this bothers me. I have heard Dr. Phil say many times that teenagers do not understand the consequences of their behavior. The frontal cortex of the brain, where this understanding takes place, is not fully developed until a person is 25. Now back to Lindsay. It’s true that Lindsay is now 26 years old, however how many years ago did she start “partying,” drinking and doing drugs? There were many reports of her out with her mother, Dina, who we have recently seen on Dr. Phil. The woman is a mess and I would go so far as to say she was an unfit mother. Never mind Lindsay’s loser father who speaks matter of factly about his daughter’s recent arrest and blames it on the city and people, not Lindsay or her parents. Dina has always loved being in the limelight and I get the impression she was living her dream for fame vicariously through her daughter. It’s no surprise that she went partying with her young daughter and that Lindsay was introduced very early to the “partying” lifestyle by dear old mom. This was during her teenage years. I could not find out exactly when it all started because there are thousands of hits for “Lindsay partying” on Google. 

So when Dr. Phil says Lindsay is an adult now, that is technically true, but her brain is fried. We don’t know if her frontal cortex had a chance of developing normally while she was under the influence of drugs and alcohol. Obviously she hasn’t been thinking clearly and making good choices for a very long time. Dr. Phil, with his impressive resume, should know all this and place much more blame on her parents and getting Lindsay proper help. Where are his resources and offers of help? Lindsay may not have the mental capacity or even be sober enough to decide she needs to go to rehab. Her parents are hopeless. The poor girl has had no parental guidance, instead she was exploited by both parents for the money she was making. So who is going to step in and save this girl’s life before she ends it with an overdose? Before she mixes too much alcohol and too many pills? Before she gets behind the wheel of a car and kills herself or others? Who? Dr. Phil? Dr. Drew? Her lawyers? The legal system who lets her out of jail in 15 minutes every time she is arrested? 

When she kills herself will everyone be crying and saying she was so young? Will they be wringing their hands saying if only we had done something? When will those closest to her wake the hell up!  It’s as predictable as Michael Jackson’s early death.

I just read this morning that Lindsay is out of jail again. Great. And everyone is failing her again. She is just a hot topic of conversation for all the talk shows and tabloids. But when the hell is someone going to step in and actually do something before her story ends in tragedy? Maybe I should send this blog off to Dr. Phil. Maybe he can do a show with Lindsay during February sweeps, if she lasts that long. 

I think it’s so sad that this once very talented 26 year old girl is being left to her own devices when it’s clear she is headed for a tragic end. Maybe all these incidents are a cry for help and no one is answering. I just can’t be the only one who sees this, and my resume is not close to being as impressive as Dr. Phil’s.

Elmo’s Voice Cracks…

Sesame Street characters have been in the news a lot lately. First there was much ado from Mitt Romney wanting to get rid of funding Big Bird and PBS. Of course, Sesame Street doesn’t need any funding, it supports itself, but the rest of PBS still does. There were no end to the jokes that the budget would be balanced and the deficit reduced if we only would get rid of PBS funding and Big Bird.

Now a new issue has hit the media regarding the voice of Elmo, Kevin Clash. Clash was recently accuse of sexual abuse by a victim who shortly thereafter recanted and said the sex was consensual and between two adults. I am always skeptical and so I thought that perhaps the matter may have been settled by Clash offering the victim money to make the matter go away. And that may have been the end of it. No one was going to investigate further to see if maybe where there is smoke, there is fire…or more alleged victims.

But yesterday, while watching the news, I see that a second 22 year old victim has come forward accusing Clash of allegedly having sex with him while he was 15. Clash and Sesame Street and deeply sadden by this personal “distraction,” and that it is taking the focus of Sesame Street away from it’s education of children. Clash has therefore done what is in the best interest of the show and resigned. I can’t be sure, but I would bet Sesame Street suggested he leave too. After all, how do we know how many more victims might come forth and accuse him of abuse. Yesterday’s victim stated that Clash allegedly made a practice of seeking out young boys and buying them expensive gifts and giving them money. If it’s not true I can’t understand why he would resign so quickly. Maybe it is in an attempt on the part of the show to quickly disassociate from the bigger scandal that is about to erupt?

Elmo is a much beloved character on Sesame Street. My kids grew up watching Sesame Street and had several Elmo toys. If these allegations are true it would be quite upsetting. Clash worked for Sesame Street for 28 years. He is well aware of their pristine reputation and how highly regarded and successful the show is in educating preschool children. He knew what he was doing. He had to also know that a scandal of this nature could be extremely detrimental and cast a dark cloud over a beloved show that has taught millions of children basic fundamental skills and given them a head start in school. Children whose parents cannot afford to send them to pre-school have gotten their first lessons from Sesame Street. Who hasn’t seen or heard of Sesame Street? It’s known world wide.

Yet, both Clash and Sesame Street are trying to downplay the seriousness of these allegations. They are referring to it as a distracting controversy. I don’t know about you, but it disturbs me that they are calling it a distraction…like an annoying mosquito that you want to shoo away. I guess at this stage of the game, before the whole truth comes out, they can afford to brush it off. But, if it should happen that Clash has a history of abuse, I wonder if they will come out with a stronger statement of disapproval and disgust? If this is true, there is something seriously wrong about a man who helps educate children, gains their confidence and love and abuses them too.  Stay tuned. Scandals like this don’t just go away.

My Psychic Experience...

I had a friend who happened to see a psychic perform at some venue. She was young and naïve and quite impressed with his abilities. She convinced me that we should make an appointment with him and each have our futures revealed. I have always been a skeptic but, in my mid twenties, I had lots of questions I wanted answered. In any case, whether he was legit or not, I figured it would be an interesting experience and fun too, so we went.

We were welcomed to his expensive home by his wife/assistant/secretary who took us to a small waiting room. I’ll admit we were excited to hear what he had to say. After a few minutes the assistant returns to the room with two pads and pens in her hand. She tells us to write down our questions on the pad and to “press hard” and that somehow this would facilitate his picking up on our thoughts. She assured us we would be keeping the paper when we were done. It wasn’t until a very long time later that it dawned on me that they would just pass a pencil over the page underneath and read what we had written. 

My friend was called in first and when she was done she seemed very content with everything he had to say. I wasn’t surprised. Then it was my turn. The skeptical side of me went in to be entertained. It was going to take a lot to convince me he was for real. Of course he knew my questions and used them to guide the session. He asked me a couple of things like was there anyone close to me whose name started with the letter “J.” I said no, even though my father’s name is Joseph and my mother went by the name Jennie. So then he said how about “G”? I said no again, but then it hit me that both my parents names started with the letter “J” and they were translated from Italian names that started with “G.” Still, I was mildly amused. He told me I would get married one day, which was really all I wanted to know. What did he have to lose to make me happy? Then he asked a peculiar question…”Do you have plumbing problems?” I was taken aback. I know I didn’t write that down and why would he ask such a ridiculous question? In any event, I didn’t have any plumbing problems. On the whole I would say I wasted my time and money. At least I got a good story out of it.

I went to work on Monday prepared to tell my adventure to my coworkers. As we took our morning break together we would discuss what we did on the weekend. Once I told them I went to see a psychic all the attention was on me. I told them about the session, the pad, the letter “J” question. My friend Janet, also a skeptic, tells me that is a popular letter for names so it’s not such a great guess on his part. Suddenly I had an idea. I wanted to try the plumbing question out to see what reaction I would get from any of them. As Janet was sipping her coffee, I asked her out of the blue, “Do you have any plumbing problems?” She almost spit put her coffee and exclaimed, “Did my husband call you this morning?” “No,” I answered, surprised at her dramatic reaction. “He had to have called you or how else would you know?” I assured her he didn’t call and how would I know what? She answered that her toilet had overflowed that very morning and he was going to work late to take care of it. She seemed pretty shaken and wanted to know why I asked her that if he hadn’t called and put me wise to it. I told her that the psychic had asked me that question out of the blue and I wanted to see what reaction I would get if I asked it. I guess many people must have plumbing problems all the time, that’s the only reason why he would blurt out a question like that. I think it freaked her out because we were talking about psychics, she was skeptical and then I managed to hit on the one thing that was weighing on her mind that morning. It was very funny to see her so stunned for those few minutes and trying to convince her that her husband hadn’t called.

I never went for another reading with any psychic. I do believe we all have some degree of psychic ability. I know my mother had some, it was a little stronger than intuition. I have had instances of it from time to time. But, I also think there are a lot of quacks out there who are good at making people think they can read minds or tell the future when it’s all about reading body language, reactions and using vague language so you can’t really be wrong. 

Military "Affairs" Part 2

I just knew this story was going to be the one that keeps on giving! I think I will update the chapters are they unfold in the news. First I am going to start with something that actually had me tossing and turning last night…20,000 to 30,000 emails in two years were exchanged between General John Allen and Jill Kelley. I had to do the math. In two years there are about 730 days. If they exchanged 20,000 emails that would be 27 emails PER DAY! If they exchanged closer to 30,000 emails it would be 41 emails PER DAY. Does anyone even write that many emails a day? I know I don’t and never did. That alone would give one pause to think.

(Side bar: I read that Petraeus, CIA Director, created a fake email account to carry on his discussions with Paula Broadwell. This irks me because everyone I know, even the least of the computer savvy people, knows that all emails addresses can be traced back to the source from the IP address. Why doesn't the Director of the CIA know this? Or if he does know it, why put himself at such risk? That's why they were able to determine Paula wrote the anonymous, threatening emails to Jill!)

Now this Jill Kelley is married to cancer surgeon Scott Kelley. Scott has been reportedly sued at least nine times. That’s good to know for those looking for a surgeon! I get the impression that this is the reason the couple is deeply in debt to the tune of about 2 million dollars and their Tampa waterfront mansion, worth 1.5 million dollars, is in foreclosure. Their office building in downtown Tampa is also close to foreclosure. It’s been speculated that perhaps Jill created this buzz over emails so she would get a book and movie deal. I don’t know about that, but it sounds plausible. Meanwhile, Paula Broadwell probably killed any chance of her book deal on the authorized biography of Petraeus. Maybe these two broads will get together and pool their knowledge for Hollywood one of these days. 

Guess what else? A new character has been added to the cast! Jill has a twin sister, Natalie Khawam. Like all twins, Jill and Natalie share many things, including being in debt. Natalie has some juicy stories in her past. It seems she sued a former employer for sexual harassment and their lawyer showed she made up a series of lies and lost her case. She is now being sued for $100,000 for their legal fees! She also lost custody of her four year old daughter after a nasty divorce. The judge found her to be extremely lacking in honesty and integrity. Both sisters seem to be well connected to military personnel, however Jill has now lost her VIP privileges to MacDill Air Force Base and must sign is like all other visitors. What a crushing blow for this military socialite.

And now for the mystery man, FBI Agent “X” has now been identified as Frederick W. Humphries II.  You remember he was the guy who had been sending Jill shirtless pictures of himself in the past and the one she went to with Paula’s threatening emails. Apparently Humphries had other agents investigate the emails and then he was “dismissed” from the case himself because he was “obsessed with it.”  I say “dismissed” because he was never really on the case. Intriguing. 

What do you suppose will be uncovered next? One email leads to another and another. There has to be something of interest in all those emails. More names? More details? I’m glad to have something to fill the void of my cherished soap operas.

Long Island Power Authority aka LIPA

I have been too angry to write a blog about LIPA, but it has to be done. LIPA is the power company who serves the people of Long Island, N.Y. or rather doesn’t serve them. They charge some of the highest rates in the country to people who pay some of the highest property taxes. Every time there is a storm, the people on Long Island lose power. So when a storm of the magnitude of hurricane Sandy hit their shores, LIPA was in no way prepared to deal with the situation. 

Today I heard that the Chief Operating Officer, Michael Hervey, resigned, effective at the end of this year. What a surprise! And why wait? Amid criticism from practically everyone he decided to take the cowardly way out. I wonder if he is getting a severance package paid for by the very people who are now without power? Many are STILL without power and I wouldn’t be surprised. 

LIPA has never really done a good job when it comes to power outages and they have been warned to beef up their operation. The haven’t and I can only guess it’s because they want to make huge profits at the expense and neglect of their customers. LIPA is virtually a monopoly. I thought there were laws against monopolies? Anyway, the people who live on Long Island are at their mercy. I heard that LIPA would be reimbursed 75% of their additional expenses in restoring power to their customers by the Federal government AND that they intend to raise rates to make up the additional 25%. In other words, for all their incompetence and negligence they intend not to lose one thin dime! And that’s not all, LIPA bills all went out on time to it’s customers. People still without power must pay if they are on the “budget plan,” which spreads out payments over a 12 month period. If they don’t pay their bills they will get disconnect notices…when the power is restored. LIPA intends to credit them with the days they are “out of power” at the end of their 12 month period. By that time they will have raised rates and their customers will end up owing them money. Pretty neat operation they have going for them?

My cousin was one of the lucky people on Long Island. She was out power only 11 days. She had to go out and get a generator, gas cans and gas on a daily basis to run the generator. There was no gas to be had, so she had to run her generator two hours on and two hours off to conserve. She runs a day care in her home, it’s her business. She is the sole provider of her family. She also cares for her husband, who has late stage multiple sclerosis. They are on a LIPA medical priority list for power. He has medical equipment that she could not run as often as necessary. She did her best to take care of him and run her business in those 11 days. On the 11th day her husband couldn’t breathe and had to go to the hospital. She had to assume a lot of additional expenses thanks to LIPA, but she still has to pay her bill? What the hell is wrong with this picture?

A friend of mine told me about her sister, who after delivering a baby by C-Section right before the storm, had to go to a hotel to be safe, with her children and mother, while her husband watched their house get flooded. The hotel lost power and she had to change the baby with the light from her cell phone. When she went back home, her basement was totally destroyed and there was no heat for the new baby. Like my cousin, they also had to get a generator to heat their home and a lot of additional gas, because they had a new born and couldn’t allow the house to get cold. Hours on gas lines, extra expense, worry, loss of possessions, and guess what? Their LIPA bill came right on time…the FEMA check was no where to be found. 

Those are just two first hand stories that I personally know about, there are tons more that are worse that I heard on the news ever since the storm hit. LIPA doesn’t inform it’s customers what is going on, no one answers their phones. I tried calling on behalf of my cousin, who had her hands full. She was really a trooper throughout and is used to dealing with life’s catastrophes, but me not so much. Just hearing how these two families suffered was bothering the hell out of me.

And guess what else? I found a facebook page that LIPA has to inform residents as to what is going on. They have a website too. Believe me when I say, they only post what they want people to know on there, not the truth. Many more were out of power than they reported. And for the life of me I don’t understand how they expect people without power to access this information? Computers need ELECTRICITY to run and recharge. I cannot tell you how disgusted I am with this company. I think they should get two or three new companies to come in and charge LIPA for all the inconvenience and expense that everyone on Long Island has had to endure because of their negligence. It may come to that too. I hear that the residents have gotten a lawyer to begin a class action lawsuit against LIPA. I can’t wait till it gets started. I hope they found someone who is ruthless and relentless. They don’t even deserve to be in business!

So if the CEO is resigning and running scared, he should be. He should be sued in civil court for his part in this chaotic fiasco that left hundreds of thousands of people in the dark literally and figuratively. It’s an outrage what this company has been allowed to do. The money they make for the service they provide is sickening!

Let’s hope justice will be swift and fair. Let’s hope the people of Long Island fight this to the bitter end and not settled out of court! Let’s hope other companies will come in and take over LIPA customers as soon as possible! 

If you have a personal story about LIPA I urge you to post it here in the comments. Maybe this blog will fall into the hands of someone who can actually use it to go after LIPA? Who knows?