Saturday, March 8, 2014

Dumb Reality Shows My Kids Watch…

First of all I am not going to sit here and type that I  do not watch dumb shows, because I do. Here are the shows that distract me from my reality: Mob Wives, Real Housewives of New York (I can only stomach one series of the franchise and my kids got me started), and of course my two ridiculous soap operas (Young and The Restless and Bold and the Beautiful). These are my guilty pleasures. Don’t worry, if I forgot any others my snarky kids will fill you in. But this blog is not about me and what I watch, it’s about what they watch…and I don’t even know the half of it.

First we have “Dance Moms,” about a seriously overweight dance instructor, Abby Lee Miller, who verbally abuses the girls in her 8 to 10 girl dance troop, and who is impossible to please even when they come in first place (they didn’t get enough points). Then add to the mix some outrageously, argumentative, petty, sarcastic, envious stage mothers who like to argue with Abby and verbally abuse their own children because winning is everything. Now, as you see there is redundancy in my description around the words “verbally abusive.” I want to know why CPS hasn’t been called on all the mothers and most especially Abby? I can’t even count the number of times these girls have cried a river over unnecessary comments and yes even insults which are damaging their self esteem. Is it me? Cause I don’t get it. Is this all about being on television? Does anyone freaking care how much emotional damage is being done to these sweet little girls and what lessons they are learning? Abby even punishes them if, for example, they want to take a senior trip with friends and miss a class or practice. She yells at them if they want to pursue other talents, like singing. Lately she has been threatening them all that they aren’t good enough and she is constantly looking for talent to replace them. These kids live in fear of being kicked out of her dance troop. The girls are subjected to their moms arguing with each other over who deserves to have a solo this week. They complain that one of the girls is Abby’s favorite and always gets special attention. Abby even has a pyramid where she unveils each of the girls’ faces, one at a time. Most of them are in the bottom row, which means their performances have been below par, or they are guilty of a petty infraction like their hair piece fell off during a competition. At the top of the pyramid is always Abby’s favorite, Matty. So poor Matty is set up to be the one the girls have to strive to beat and the Mom’s hate the favoritism so they are always talking about Matty and her mother. All I can do is shake my head. This is entertainment?

Then we have a new show, at least I think it’s new, called Couple’s Therapy. The couples are beyond helping for the most part, especially when you have a therapist that curses a blue streak and breaks down crying in front of her “clients.” I just can’t get into the show enough to complain about it decently enough. This is what I do know, Jon (from Jon and Kate Plus 8), who could not stand Kate’s verbal abusiveness anymore, goes out and find another “Kate” named Liz, to cohabitate with and wonders why they have issues. Duh! Then there is a rapper, Ghost Killer Face (whatever) who is on the show with a girl named Kelsey. He is very upset because she didn’t tell him she was a stripper years before they met. He gives her hell about keeping her past a secret. Then, guess what? Turns out he has been cheating on her the whole time they have been together with a woman he has been seeing before he even met her. Neither woman knows about the other. So he wants the other woman on the show so HE can decide who he really loves and wants to be with! Oy vey. There is a single girl, Farrah, on the show. She is not part of a couple so why is she even there? All she does is cry and then you can’t understand a freaking word she says. There is a lesbian couple, and one of them is really nuts/unstable and the other one has to keep trying to figure out how to make her happy. Then there is Taylor Armstrong, who I think was on the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills a while back. She is there with her new husband, the previous one committed suicide (I wonder why). Her bloated lips may qualify her to be in the fish species. I hate them. Taylor is used to the good life and complains that her towels aren’t the right color and the food tastes like school cafeteria food. Enough said. Just a few temper tantrums for the “therapist” to work on. Done with this show.

My older daughter watches “Sister Wives” which even my younger daughter cannot stand. It’s about an obnoxious Mormon man, Cody, who is married to four wives. They consider themselves “sister wives.” They claim they aren’t jealous of each other, but there are times when it’s obvious they are. The wives and their respective children all have their own home on a cul-de-sac in Vegas. It took them forever to find 4 homes close together so the kids can play with each other and yet each wife has her own home…and of course Cody doesn’t have to waste much time traveling about since he has to divide his time fairly amongst all four women. I don’t know how many children he has altogether, but my younger daughter and I can’t stomach the lifestyle and I don’t think these women are happy. Mind you, he is all for plurality of marriage BUT finds it disgusting if a woman, or let’s say one of his wives, wanted more than one husband. There are so many things that annoy me about this show that I am going to blame it for part of my high blood pressure.

There are many more shows they watch. Some of them they save until I have gone to bed so they don’t have to hear me complain. I think that’s best too. The quality of television has hit rock bottom. I’m so glad I have a nice big flat screen tv to watch it all on.

Wednesday, March 5, 2014

Girls Sues Parents

It's all over the news the past couple of days and here are the facts. Rachel Canning, 18, a high school senior, is suing her parents to get them to pay for the rest of her high school education and college. Her high school has already said they won't kick her out. "The lawsuit asks that her parents pay the remaining tuition for her last semester at her private high school, pay her current living and transportation expenses, commit to paying her college tuition and pay her legal fees for the suit she filed against her parents." Who is paying her lawyer? The father of the friend that Rachel is currently staying with since she walked out of her family home four months ago. She left home because she didn't want to obey the rules. Apparently Rachel had a boyfriend who her parents thought was a bad influence on her and they wanted her to stop seeing him. An honor student in previous years, Rachel has been in serious trouble the past year. In October she was suspended from her expensive private school for truancy. Her boyfriend was also suspended. The parents took away her car and phone privileges. Rachel didn't like that. CSP was contacted based on Rachel's allegations of parental abuse and the investigation determined they were unfounded. Her parents are distraught. The rules they imposed on her included and 11 o'clock curfew and chores. The parents are upset with the family who took their daughter in and financed this law suit for her, and rightly so. Yesterday the judge ruled against Rachel saying, "Do we want to establish a precedent where parents live in basic fear of establishing rules of the house?" Family Division Judge Peter Bogaard asked. Rachel is seeking to remain unemancipated so her parents will be responsible for all her expenses. The judge also cited certifications submitted by the Sean and Elizabeth Canning about their daughter’s alleged history of staying out and drinking during the week. Once, he said, she was driven home by her boyfriend’s parents at 3 a.m. In addition, Bogaard said, Rachel was removed from her position as captain of the cheer leading squad and from the campus ministry. "What kind of parents would the Cannings be if they did not discipline her?" he asked. "The Cannings had the right to set up rules."

I think Rachel's parents are within their rights to refuse to pay for college. College is a privilege, not a right. College is expensive. I can see helping out a child, when you can and they deserve it, to keep loans down and allowing them more time to study. My younger daughter had no free time to work with the demands of her major. She spent almost all her time at home studying or doing assignments. Both of my girls worked hard throughout their academic careers and my husband and I wanted to help them in any way we could. But, Rachel has made some bad choices. She doesn't seem to appreciate everything she has been given. Her parents paid for her tuition at her private school and she was suspended. Her behavior at school was such that it caused her to be removed from two groups she participated in. Why should her parents pay for her last semester?  Why should they invest money in her college education? How do they know she won't drop out, skip classes and have to retake them, or fnd other ways of getting nto trouble? She broke their trust and their hearts. I knew a girl in college who dropped out after her third year to marry a guy her parents didn't approve of. Then she moved away. I heard some time later the marriage didn't work out, but she had a baby and her whole life was forever changed. Rachel sounds like spoiled brat used to getting her way. This is what she demanded and the judge refused: "Rachel Canning had sought immediate relief in the form of $650 in weekly child support and the payment of the remainder of her tuition at Morris Catholic High School, as well as attorney's fees." What nerve! I agree the parents needed to show some tough love. But their plan has been sabatoged.

I am not so much pissed at Rachel for her ungrateful behavior towards her parents, but at the Ingelsino family, who are financing her law suit. What business is this of theirs? Instead of acting as mediators and trying to help this broken family reconcile, their "well intentioned" interferance is causing more problems than ever. I think it's alienation of parental affection. They are helping her attack her parents. And where does it say she is entitled to all the things she is demanding? She is able bodied. Let her go get a job and see what it feels like to earn money the hard way instead of having it handed to her. She says her parents earn over $300,000 a year and can afford to pay for her college. Maybe they can, maybe they choose not to. It is their money to spend as they see fit. She is 18 and considered an adult. This is their family's personal business. But, instead of trying to fix the matter through reconcliation, these Ingelsino's made it easy for her to stay away from her family and not suffer any consequences for her behavior. They provide her with a roof over her head and nice home cooked meals and who knows what else. If they enjoy being so involved, let them pay for her college and expenses and wait for years or decades while she tries to pay them back. I don't think they will be so eager to do all that, do you? I think these people should be sued for helping cause possibly irreparable damage to the relationships in this family. Can't wait to see what the judge decides about college...I don't think he is going to want to set a precedent that parents have to pay for their children's education!