Thursday, April 23, 2015

Why Am I Watching Season 7 of RHONY?

Countess LuAnn Wearing her "tribal" necklace!
I add this picture for my daughter because she gets a kick out of LuAnn's crazy necklaces
and because I heard LuAnn  (of "Money Doesn't Buy You Class fame) mentioned one season she was part Native American (probably .000058 per cent, but still).

Well the obvious answer as to why I am “watching” is because my daughters like to put it on and make fun of these middle aged women who are trying to make a show about nothing. They have watched for years and are probably a little addicted to the “drama.” I watch Mob Wives, so there could never been enough drama on any of the REAL Housewives shows to shock me. But I do enjoy spending time with my girls and hearing them laugh and exchange snaky remarks at the latest antics of these season’s cast.

I should warn you that if you don’t watch the show then you probably won’t enjoy the blog and it’s references. That being said, the season is off to a slow start. What else is new? And they have been throwing in way too many clips from past seasons which is enough to confuse anyone who didn’t watch those seasons or has a lousy memory.

This season is about Cougars and divorcees mostly. The she-wolves pack is single and on the hunt for mates. The age of the potential “hook-up” is of no consequence, in fact, the younger the better. These 50+ year old desperate housewives are seeking out men in their 20’s and having flings. Well, the stallions have to sow their wild oats some place, might as well be in an old hag. In this group we have Sonja, who drinks and sleeps around and is applauded for her conquests. Then we have the Countess Lu Ann, who recently broke up with a French David Schwimmer look-a-like named Jacques, and is currently on the prowl for a replacement. Ramona Singer, who has flaunted her “happy” marriage to Mario for years, only to find her husband guilty of cheating and possibly fathering a baby out of wedlock, dumped his sorry ass and is now practicing the art of flirting with any man who locks eyes with her. It should be noted that after a night of drinking a man will lock eyes with a pig wearing pink lipstick if it gets them into bed, but Ramona finds this flattering. Of course, best selling author, Carole Radziwell, in on the hunt, but she is a little more discreet about it.

In the other group we have two married and boring women, Heather and Kristin. We have Ramona’s sister, who hasn’t said a word yet; and Ramona’s friend Dorinda who is dating a chubby, older man who must have money. Dorinda has a big mouth and she isn’t afraid to use it. She is an equal opportunity “insulter,” and never misses a chance to let anyone know what she is thinking. The most interesting thing she has said so far, during a spat between two of the other wives, is that she can’t stand all the “back and forth.” Apparently, Dorinda has never seen the RHONY and either way, she is definitely on the wrong show if that is a pet peeve of hers.

I don’t know where to put Bethenny, who has returned after being gone a few years making money and having her own talk show. She is a loose cannon who doesn’t seem to like anyone or want to hear what they have to say. However, there are no shortage of words when it comes to her giving others her opinion. I am on the fence about her. She will either make the season interesting or provoke me to throw Aviva’s leg at my television. That remains to be seen at the moment.

I’m glad I got this off my chest. I feel a lot better now.

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